Book Review: The First! - Dom Mazzetti's The Swoly Bible



Plume Books was kind enough to send me my first book to review for the blog. The book is Dom Mazzetti's The Swoly Bible. The Bro Science Way of Life. I've never done a book review for the blog before and thought that it would be fun.

I have seen Dom's videos on Youtube many times before and follow him on Facebook so I was already familiar with what I was getting myself into. I didn't expect however that I would read this entire book in Dom Mazetti's voice in my head which is both distracting and hysterical but frustrating because I can't make it stop.

The book starts out talking about Dom Mazetti's life in small farm town New Jersey. Like lots of people. he used to be "small". Also like many people who strive to become big, Dom started lifting because a girl turned him down and Dom decided he had to get yoked. From there he hit the gym like mad, started the Youtube channel Bro Science Life and then wrote this book.

The book continues with a muscle glossary to make sure we're all on the same page and using the same language. After the glossary is a section called "The Seven Stages of the Lifting Man Synopsis". In this section Dom lays out what he says are the seven stages you go through as a lifter. Stage one is Primordial Ooze. Stage two is Tadpole. Three: Brotege (I can't make the accent marks! Where are those darn things?) Stage Four is Gym Bro. Five is Gym Rat. Stage six is Monster and seven is Freak Beast. Do you see the progression here? The chapters and topics in the book are also laid out in a way that progress from beginner level material to things that are more and more involved. It's actually well thought out.

Swoly Bible, like Holy Bible. Get it? It's the only picture I could find of myself dressed as a priest. 


I'll touch on a few chapters I really appreciated:

Chapter 3: What is a pump?
A pump is what happens when you lift and your muscles fill with blood and magic. I really enjoyed the chapter all about the pump. I love it because it feels very reminiscent of the movie Pumping Iron when Arnold Schwarzenegger is talking about how the pump feels. "A pump is like giving birth to a son and knowing he is going to be good at sports."

Chapter 5: Locker Room Etiquette.
There was not a single mention of pussy grabbing in the Locker room Etiquette chapter of the book. This leads me to believe that Donald Trump doesn't lift and isn't hanging out in the same locker rooms that truly Swole people are. It does mention that there's no reason to stand around naked in the locker room so much, and that it's not a good time to tell other people how much you enjoy watching Dexter. Valuable information!

Chapter 27: How to Get Your Girlfriend to Start Lifting
This chapter begins by pointing out something real and true that happens when many people change their lifestyles and really adopt fitness as part of their routine. You begin to want your significant other to take part in your new activity, lifting! The book also recognizes that this is not something your partner asked for, and then plows right through that realization to tell you ways to try and convince her anyway. Art imitates life and there is a lot of real life hidden among the funny in this book.

That's the biggest compliment I can give Dom Mazzetti and this book - hidden among the things he says that are super funny is a lot of really good and valid information. "If you want to earn some respect, then concentrate on a full range of motion and good form" Dom also knows you shouldn't lift your feet up when you're bench pressing. You want a wide and stable base of support! Dom shares that Deadlifting is the king of exercises and that you need to practice good form with a high priority. I am pretty sure he and I even feel the same way about straps. He tells us not to do half reps, he tells us to use a spotter. At the same time don't read too much into this because it is primarily comedy geared toward straight men who spend a lot of time in the gym. Your gramma won't like it and it's probably not the best book to give to your kid who is just learning how to lift properly. Some people may have trouble separating fact and decent information from comedy.

The Swoly Bible does spend a lot of time in the gym where I work because I like to randomly read quotes from it between sets to amuse clients (when we're not working on mean mugging) or when I'm sitting at a desk in the lobby. "When you get a pump, you are becoming the absolute biggest and best version of yourself, for like, two hours."

While I do enjoy most of Dom Mazzetti's humor I dislike some of the more homophobic and misogynistic jokes he makes. I know comedy is supposed to be wild and sometimes piss people off, but as a fitness professional I want strength to be available to everyone and this definitely is meant for a specific audience. I would say that if you plan to buy this book for someone as a gift that you should watch a few of Dom's videos first and see if the comedy is to your liking. With that being said, this is a pretty funny read and if you have a special bro in your life they may appreciate this book. Check it out!